From our friends at Slapstick Anarchy:

Hurting from months of bad press thanks to protest group Anonymous, still stinging from epically poor book sales drives, and apparently running out of ideas on how to waste members’ money, UFO cult Scientology has launched a new cable television ad campaign touting Dianetics as a means of “unlocking your potential” on par with great discoveries of science.

This ad has been spotted on A&E, MSNBC, BBC America, the History Channel, USA, and MTV. Hopefully they will end up spending more on the campaign than they receive from new members.

See any mention of religion, or even of Scientology? The cult attracts people by posing as a self-help group, and only after investing thousands of dollars and countless hours with the group are they initiated into the secrets of its UFO lore.

Also, the old-school Xenu volcano made me piss myself.