Operation Clambake presents a series of audio files, excerpts from Hubbard. Some are mp3, some unfortunately are Real Audio. All fascinating listening, here are some of the favourites on the Temple jukebox:

Hubbard on Venus. “We all believe Venus has a methane atmosphere and is unliveable. I almost got run down by a freight locomotive the other day, didn’t look very uncivilised to me. I’m allergic to freight locomotives, they, always running into you.”

Hubbard on Jupiter. “You find somebody running around the planet Jupiter, he’d be built to withstand that climatic condition, and the gravitic condition and so forth, and his legs might be a bit modified and his arms and that sort of thing, but he would probably look like an Eskimo.” (???)

Hubbard on Islam and Christianity (2). Scientology publicly claims to be compatible with religious faiths; its teaching that these religions are the product of brainwashing implants created millions of years ago may be an obstacle to this, however.

Hubbard on the Obscene Dog Incident:

The Obscene Dog was a sort of a brass dog in a sitting position and anybody who got around to the front of the dog got caught in some electronic current and passed through the dog to the dogs rear end and spat out. Thetans didn’t like this.”